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When You Feel More Like a Maid Than a Wife and a Mother

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    How do you help your spouse lose weight? Yesterday I was talking about how to heat up your sex life, and I was hoping to run a post today on how to make HIM feel great in bed. But I had so many comments on older posts come in yesterday about problems with a spouse’s […]

    The post Top 10 Ways to Support a Spouse Struggling to Lose Weight appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    Can how we see our bodies affect our sex lives more than how our bodies actually look? For women, I’ve said again and again: our brains are our biggest sex organ. And what often gets in the way of our sex drive is the way we think about our bodies. When we start believing all these lies […]

    The post 10 Ways to Love Your Body–and Want to Share it With Your Husband! appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    I firmly believe that the main reason so many of us struggle with weight is that we don’t understand it. And this desire to “lose weight” too often manifests itself in this attitude where food and your body are the enemy, and you have to defeat them. That’s depressing. That’s a losing game. And it’s […]

    The post Please Don’t Resolve to Lose Weight This New Year’s appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    Does your husband make you feel insecure? Last week I wrote about how sex can make you feel powerful. But I know that in all too many marriages the opposite is the case. Your husband says things that make you feel ugly, degraded, or objectified. Every Friday I like to write a Marriage Moment, a […]

    The post When Your Husband Ruins Your Confidence appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    My daughter Rebecca recently started preaching to me about the benefits of a capsule wardrobe. Basically, you try to get your wardrobe down to only a certain number of pieces–some say 25, some say 40–and then you work with just those. You buy high quality pieces, with lots of neutral basics. You accessorize with pretty […]

    The post How I Use a Capsule Wardrobe to Fight the Frump! appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    Is it possible to have a conversation about weight in a healthy way? Every Monday I like to put up a reader question and take a stab at answering it, but today I’ve got one of my own that I wanted to tackle: how can we frame body image issues properly? I really have no […]

    The post How Do We Talk About Weight in a Healthy Way? appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    Can you truly believe that your body is your friend? On Monday I wrote a long post asking you all to help me synthesize something–how do we talk about body image, weight, beauty, and health in a good way? On the one hand we know that our culture puts way too much emphasis on a […]

    The post Can You See Your Body as Your Friend? appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    How do you help your spouse lose weight? Yesterday I was talking about how to heat up your sex life, and I was hoping to run a post today on how to make HIM feel great in bed. But I had so many comments on older posts come in yesterday about problems with a spouse’s […]

    The post Top 10 Ways to Support a Spouse Struggling to Lose Weight appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    Can how we see our bodies affect our sex lives more than how our bodies actually look? For women, I’ve said again and again: our brains are our biggest sex organ. And what often gets in the way of our sex drive is the way we think about our bodies. When we start believing all these lies […]

    The post 10 Ways to Love Your Body–and Want to Share it With Your Husband! appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    I firmly believe that the main reason so many of us struggle with weight is that we don’t understand it. And this desire to “lose weight” too often manifests itself in this attitude where food and your body are the enemy, and you have to defeat them. That’s depressing. That’s a losing game. And it’s […]

    The post Please Don’t Resolve to Lose Weight This New Year’s appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    Do you find it hard to get comfortable with your body? And is part of the problem that you just don’t understand how your body works? A reader just sent me this question: Recently I was talking to some friends and we agreed that growing up as conservative Christians we didn’t always receive the best education on […]

    The post 10 Resources to Help You Get More Comfortable with Your Body appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    How many times have you heard calls for women to dress modestly in terms of “you don’t want to be a stumbling block”? Phew. This has been a tiring week on the blog–and I knew it would be. I’ve been talking about how the idea that all men will lust is wrong, and how we […]

    The post Why “Don’t Be a Stumbling Block” is A Really Bad Modesty Message appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    Body image is such a huge issue for adult women. But it’s even more so for teenage girls! Right now my daughters are putting the finishing touches on an online course that moms can use to help teach their daughters about sex, puberty, and growing up (you’ll hear all about it in about 3 weeks!) […]

    The post 3 Truths to Teach Your Girls About their Bodies appeared first on To Love, Honor and Vacuum.


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    Do you feel frumpy? Look, no one has to live up to society’s standard of beauty. No one needs to be a size 4. But what I’m talking about has nothing to do with your figure and everything to do with the amount of effort we decide to put into our appearance. Why should it […]

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    We’re in the early part of our Fight the Frump week! And for this edition, I want to talk about hair. But first, let’s go back to some basic principles. Fighting the frump is NOT about vanity and not about living up to some magazine cover. Fighting the frump is about changing our attitude and […]

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    Let’s fight the frump today by talking about makeup! All week we’ve been talking about getting rid of that frumpy feeling by taking care of our appearance and showing that we respect ourselves. It’s not about being a fashion model or having a certain body type. It’s just about looking like you care about yourself, […]

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    It’s Fight the Frump week here at To Love, Honor and Vacuum, and today we’re going to talk about how to find items of clothing that fit and flatter you. We’ve talked about hair and makeup so far, because your face is where people look first. You want it to be framed well and to […]

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    Are you ready to create outfits that work for you? We’ve been talking all week about how to fight the frump, covering hair, natural-looking makeup, and finding clothes that fit and flatter. Now we’re going to bring it all together by talking about that final, put together look. So let’s go back to Monday for […]

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    How do you choose sexy pajamas–that are still warm? Recently I wrote a “Fight the Frump” series at the blog, where I encouraged all of us to try to spend just a few minutes looking put together every morning–to show that we respect ourselves. It was a super fun week, but in the middle of […]

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